Meet ‘Non-Binary Edinburgh’

Non-Binary Edinburgh is a community-led group supported by LGBT Health and Wellbeing. It is a safe space for non-binary and genderqueer people to join in and relax. The group gets together online on Zoom every second Friday for a chill catch-up.

In this interview, group leader Moira Daykin (she/they) tells us a bit more about the history of Non-Binary Edinburgh, how it all started, where things are at now, what were the effects of moving online and what’s in the future of the group.

Group leader Moira (left) and volunteer Ari (right)

How did the group start?

We started talking about the group in late 2015, then it was mostly discussion about how to start a group that was focused for those who identify as non-binary or were curious about their gender expression and identity.

At the time a lot of social groups generally focused on the aspects of binary genders and we wanted to open the door for more people. A lot of talk was focused on providing a space that could be calm, welcoming and accessible. For a while it was mostly finding the right people, I was brought into the group within the first month or so of it coming into existence. We used to operate out of the Leith Community Arts Centre, on the first Friday of the month. I used to work not too far away, so I would often be getting myself a coffee and head straight down after work to get ready. It was a different space to the original LGBT Health and Wellbeing premises. But despite its odd quirks (such as the flamenco dancers next door), we made it our own space.

What was it like in the beginning?

Well, I certainly had no idea what I was doing! And in hindsight there was a sort of fun about that. I didn’t want to be a group leader that was all “I’m here, I take charge I’m running everything with other group leaders”. After all, we made this space for people like us, I wanted to be part of it.

In the early days though we had yet to really find out rhythm. We had book discussions, movie chatter, we spoke to representatives from Chalmers Street. Though over time we quickly formed a rhythm. It’s funny looking back on it because we spent so much time trying to make a dynamic happen that just letting one flow organically form the group meeting was so much easier and beneficial for the group. Every meeting took place on a Friday, the first Friday of the month, so it became a group space of letting off steam, socialising, getting to know people and having a communal space where we felt secure in who we are. Eventually it just became that, a good space to relax and let the guards down a little, with a chance to talk to people who understood each other and could understand some of the problems we all faced.

How has the group grown?

Certainly it’s grown in size. It feels like it keeps getting bigger and bigger, especially online! That has been a bit of a curse and a blessing. Moving online has been a pain for connecting with other people in person and doing all the things we had wanted to do, like a group movie night, or a chance to have a summer BBQ.

But having an online space has allowed us to invite people in and let them get accustomed to the space in their own time. That’s the blessing of an online space such as Zoom, or Discord, you can take part, or if you’re just there to listen and have this sort of sideline chill out listening experience, you can mute your mic, turn off your webcam and just sort of enjoy the social atmosphere. We have a few people who do that, sort of silent listen along, only to unmute to come in with a wonderfully bad pun relating to the discussion and then go back to mute while we all laugh.

How has the change from in person to online effected your group?

I think it was fairly easy for us. Given that we had a group that met once a month, but really wanted to meet more often, we decided to make a dedicated online space for them in the form of a Discord server allowing people to keep in touch. It didn’t take long for us to go “Now hang on a second” when things started to close and we quickly moved online and started to make use of Zoom. I think we all still needed that sense of community online, even if what we could do at first was limited, we just liked hanging out with each other, talking about our week, and maintain a sense of normality in a very scary time.

What sort of plans do you have for the future of your group being online?

We really want to use this chance to get to know other groups. Previously we would have been at the mercy of finding a venue, now with the ever-expanding list of online tools we can use, we’re almost spoilt for choice. It’s funny how that once we moved into lockdown, things actually became easier for us to do. One of the biggest hurdles for the group was providing an accessible, cheep and easy to reach venue, now we can do this all from a little tool you have on your desk or in your pocket. I do miss meeting in person, it’s been a strength of the group to be able to meet up in person and just talk. So I will be happy to return to those days, along with perhaps being able to have the same level of online connectivity in our off days.

What are you looking forward to most about having in person events again?

Hugs, and sharing cakes.

We used to be big sweet treat snackers back in the day, (I still am!) But I do miss it when people would bring in biscuits, cakes, someone once even brought in a tub of ice cream to share in the summer and we just sat around chilling and eating food. There’s something fun about a communal meal that helps bring people together. Dinner with friends is the best of ways to spend the evening. I think once we are safe to get back together there will be a Non-Binary Edinburgh potluck.